Talk Bronx New York

 

This has to happen. Pedro Martinez has to take the ball in the Bronx tonight and cut and curve and quick-pitch the overhyped Yankees hitters into knots. He has to lick those long fingers and throw those 76 mph high changeups and put the entire tri-state region into a palpable state of panic.

He has to beat the Yankees tonight, force a Game 7 and hand some smart tabloid editor the chance to make backpage history. Pedro has to glare in at Mark Teixeira and Alex Rodriguez after punching them out in a big spot, and his photo has to appear tomorrow with the obvious headline:

The Man Who Stares At Goats.

This just has to happen. Pedro has to knock them out with his sheer force of will, just like George Clooney does to the real goats in those incessant TV commercials. This whole thing has unfolded like some kind of corny baseball movie. Only we don’t know how this one will turn out. You can go to the movies tonight, but I have news for you: Michael Jackson dies in the end. Pedro vs. the Yanks? We don’t know what’s going to happen.

All we know is that, for drama, for fun, for pure entertainment value, the Phillies have the perfect guy on the mound. Pedro has been called a lot of things in his brilliant career, but how about this for a first: best bargain in baseball. Commissioner Bud Selig ought to hand Martinez a bonus for all the eyeballs he will attract tonight. The Phillies signed Martinez for $2 million. For the record, the Red Sox [team stats] paid about 10 TIMES THAT for the worthless pitching trio of Brad Penny, John Smoltz and Takashi Saito.

Pedro, obviously, is not the pitcher he once was, but all the better. At 38, he has to get by on guts and guile and pure desire, and in this situation, in an elimination game in front of an extremely hostile crowd, isn’t it nice to know your pitcher at least wants the ball? Cole Hamels just wants to go home and Phillies teammate Brett Myers wants to hit someone. New York’s A.J. Burnett wants to die. And you just know Andy Pettitte, who is 37 and had shoulder problems in September, wants another day of rest but instead will be on the mound tonight for the Yankees.

Before Game 2, Pedro Martinez called himself the “most influential player” ever to play at Yankee Stadium, and that, he said, included Yankees, even those whose names and faces that appear on monuments behind center field. He also said it’s hard not to feel “special” when 60,000 people are rooting against you. At least he admits it, in his own inimitable way. He is a diva, a drama queen, an egomaniac and a fierce competitor who never stops scouring the earth for disrespect. The other day, he said in Spanish that he had “frog’s blood” running through his veins, which just might be his greatest asset as a pitcher.

When he left the mound after allowing three runs in six-plus innings in Game 2, he gazed up into the frantic New York crowd and saw a man who was heckling profanely in front of his young daughter. Pedro took a moment to admonish the lout before heading to the clubhouse.

Just Pedro being Pedro. He was the greatest pitcher we ever saw in this city and the most thoroughly entertaining performer in any sport. He was more thoughtful in his second language than Roger Clemens was in his first. Of course, his ego is almost Obama-sized, so he had to leave town when Curt Schilling [stats] commanded some of the stage. Too bad for him and for us, but tonight we get one last chance to watch him work.

This has to happen. He has to impose his will on this uneven New York lineup and bring us all back to the Bronx for a seventh game tomorrow night. The alternative is almost too much to stomach. The Phillies fail tonight or tomorrow, and all of a sudden, Kate Hudson’s soulmate is a man complete, a happy Hall of Famer with a ring on his finger and nothing left to prove.

The Yankees win one more game, and Johnny Damon is forever remembered as a base-running savant, a genius who knew enough to run to the empty base. Burnett and Teixeira are $263 million well spent. Hank Steinbrenner is the benevolent new boss who was smart enough to hand Brian Cashman half a billion dollars and get out of the way. Pettitte and A-Rod are yucking it up with Jay Leno and Larry King while their fellow juicer, Clemens, is fighting Danny Bonaduce in Reno.

Pedro can prevent all that, or at least he can do his part. A win tonight and all the pressure shifts back to the Yankees. And who knows what happens in Game 7? Hamels, last year’s World Series MVP, gets to prove he’s no quitter. Ryan Howard gets to show up at last. Everyone becomes available out of the bullpen. Cliff Lee, Myers - even Pedro. Maybe he can give them one last dramatic inning.

This has to happen. The most influential player ever to play in Yankee Stadium has to exert his influence tonight. The man with the shark eyes and the frog’s blood has to stare down the vaunted Yankees and turn these heroes into goats. All eyes on Pedro tonight. He’s probably smiling already.

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Tags: alex rodriguez, Andy Pettitte, Brian Cashman, Bronx News, Bronx People, Bud Selig, Hank Steinbrenner, Mark Teixeira, Pedro Martinez, Phillies, Red Sox, roger clemens, Sports, The Bronx, World Series, Yankee Stadium

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